Self Esteem Driven by Strangers

you dont know how it feels to feel unwanted. you dont have to force your way into a compliment. you dont have to worry about making someone dissatisfied. you dont.

Love

People ask me why? I can never fully explain. My love for you is limitless, unconditional and undescribale. I love you.

Damned

I am not accomplishing the goals i set to achieve. I am allowing myself to procrastinate and put me in situations which i should not be in. As of right now i am a failure. I am letting my goals and future slip through my hands by will. Why? Why am i damning myself and stripping myself of my destiny?

Merry-go-round

Im so sick and tired of this merry-go-round we're stuck on. Around and around and around and around we go. Forever touching the same spots in the past because we're on a non-linear course since you refuse to let go. Unable to move forward. Stagnant. Going around in the same cirlcle of distrust, misuse, mental abuse and fucked up attitudes. Insecurity is the worst drug to abuse. Yet its the one you constantly choose to misuse. When addicted its worse to get over than crack. Once you lose your trust and security of someone you can hardly ever get them back. I was wrong in the past but i promise you now im right but Im not sure if i want to ride your merry-go-round for the rest of my life...

EGO

Male egos kill the best of times...

i HATE new girls

I'll kill this bitch is she gets in my way of getting what i want and need!

dtupity, Dtupidty, DTUPIDITY

Your stupidity and dependency amazes me. You let others control how you are with me. Believe their every word whether truth or lie. Whether they be friend or foe. Which means what? I dont matter when it comes to me. What i say has no effect on you. Which is too bad because only what i say matters. Why cant you see that? And once again i am ashamed to say that someone so close to me has made the not so wise one who said "wisdom comes with age" a liar. Real men fight their own battles coward.

HOW DARE YOU!

How dare you take anothers word over mine!!! How freaking dare you!!!!!!

Mrs. Black Panther

You are the modern day outspoken black panther. You voice your opinions and make sure you are heard. You fight for your rights. Arrange protest. Enact boycotts and attract the media to any wrong doing yet when it comes to me you are as quiet as a mouse. You take yourself and your children to a safe haven and leave me to play hop-scotch with the devil. Is it because you feel i am strong enough to fight my own battles or is it that im of no importance to you?

You call yourself a Man

You throw temper tantrums. You kick down doors. You do as little as possible in your houshold. You teach your children nothing. You disrespect your wife. You disrespect yourself. You speak with venom instead of wisdom. You handle your problems as if you are a child who knows no better. You conduct yourself in a manor unbefitting for your age yet you call yourself a man. I am thankful to have a father who showed me how a real man talks, how a real man walks, how a real man handles himself in stressful and unforeseen circumstances, how a real man treats his woman, how a real man composes himself infront of his children, how a real man takes care of his household, who showed me what a real man was. You sir, are no man rather a child trapped in the body of one. Someone said wisdom comes with age. You made that person a liar. It is a shame that a woman 27 years your minor has more sense and business about herself than you. It is a shame that i am more of a man than you.

Problem Solver

Dear Ms. Lady
Its funny how you can long to be there for other people and help them solve their problems but that same wisdom you use with them disappears when it comes to your own...

Changes

I told you i would change for you. That i lied to you about to your face for here we are back at square one. I did not do it intentionally so please sir dont think i have. Man is a complex animal not even its self can understand. I try and fail. Time after time. Forgive me. I am not the goddess you thought me to be but only a human with flaws that can not be changed over night.

HEY YOU THERE

Sometimes i dont know if i complete your puzzle...which am i? That found missing piece or the piece that is somehow there but doesn't belong? Where do i really stand in your world?